BUT IT DID!
The Milwaukee Brewers have given a minor-league deal to former Oriole and 3rd greatest Rule 5 draft pick ever (after Johan Santana and Josh Hamilton, quite a drop off) Jay Gibbons. Gibbons was last seen being terrible in Orioles' Spring Training and then being cut by the team. Before that he had various accomplishments including a few decent seasons, being red-haired, and begrudgingly giving your author a pound while sitting in his (Jay's, not mine) very nice Mercedes.
So, Jay, best of luck to you. Brewers, you deserve whatever you get.